How does Moses make his
tea? Hebrews it.
Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!
A cartoonist
was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
I used to be a banker,
but then I lost interest.
Haunted French pancakes give me the
crêpes.
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a
Liverpool.
I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
They told me I
had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.
I changed my iPod's name to
Titanic. It's syncing now.
Jokes about German sausage are the
wurst.
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can
stop any time.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then
it dawned on me.
This girl said she
recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.
When
chemists die, they barium.
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just
can't put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a
play on words.
PMS jokes aren't funny; period...
Why were the
Indians here first? They had reservations.
We're going on a class trip to
the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.
I didn't like my beard
at first. Then it grew on me.
Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher
who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?
When you get a
bladder infection urine trouble.
Broken pencils are
pointless.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A
thesaurus.
I dropped out of communism class because of lousy
Marx.
All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. The
police have nothing to go on.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded
dough.