Instead of watching the news during dinner on Tuesday evening, Lon and I switched the channel to QVC in hopes of a more palatable dining experience.
About the time we were scraping our plates, Today's Special Value offered us a bargain to chew on. Tell me. Who in his right mind can ignore a "special value?"
Almost too quickly, after seeing and hearing the merits of Liz Claiborne's Acorn Gingham bedsheets, Lon and I agreed that we simply couldn't sleep well without a set on our bed. Holy cow! A set of LC's king-size sheets with not just two, but four pillowcases for only $59.95, (normally priced at $129.95)! We realized immediately that we'd be fools to pass up such a value.
I nearly broke my neck rushing to grab the phone. With receiver in hand, I dialed the QVC number which thankfully is conveniently ever-present on the television screen. I placed our order and when completed, I was asked if I'd like to be on the air. With half a glass of wine in one hand and the laid-back attitude the ingested half had provided, I agreed to share my thoughts regarding our bedsheet purchase. Thus, Cheryl (aka Shaddy) from Wisconsin was heard chatting on the air by shoppers from coast to coast.
I revealed to the nation that Lon and I were on our screen porch having dinner and watching QVC. I chatted about what I had ordered, what we liked about the LC sheets and previous orders I'd placed with them. I expressed that, "The gingham pattern in the timely autumn colors are fabulous and we absolutely MUST add them to our bedsheet collection." (That's the manner in which QVC callers talk when interviewed. Certain adjectives and verbs are always appropriate and dramatic emphasis interspersed throughout the conversation is common and in fact encouraged).
After my national television audio performance, I sank back in my chair and without pause slam dunked the bottom half of my glass of wine. A whopper of a hot flash immediately followed and although damp and red-faced, I joined Lon in chuckling over the evening's unexpected twist and agreed that it sure beat watching the news.
(To read of and observe more of Shaddy's shenanigans, see my previous posts covering everything from Edy's luscious fruit bars to Oregon Soap Shoppe's super-scented soap bars).